Yes, I’m back! Today I have a guest post from CJ Adams, author of Sasha, Extraordinary Dachshund.
How best can the bond with your animal companion be formed?
Figuratively speaking the word BOND is defined as “a force or feeling that unites people; a common emotion or interest.”
I believe all animals understand relationships and that they play a role in them. But, I believe dogs have a natural capacity for actually bonding in relationships. It may be even be instinctual for their species. I am not a scientist nor have I studied the Human/Animal Bond on any level. My observations and thoughts are formed through my personal experiences. We humans are given the credit for domesticating the wolf but I believe the wolf played an equal role in developing the cross-species relationship we define as domestication.
There are many examples of other cross-species bonding beyond our canine – Homo sapiens relationship. I believe all animals, but especially dogs, can sense love and devotion being given to them and that they are capable of giving love and devotion to other species. When predator and prey can eat from the same dish that tells me something happened somewhere along their life’s stages that was stronger than their natural instincts. At some point they developed a bond – it may defy explanation – but it cannot be denied.
I am partial to dogs and I consider myself a “cat person,” but I have never bonded with any of my cats like I have with my dogs. Not from lack of trying, as I have treated my cats as well as any of my dogs and I loved them with the same ferocity. Even though I knew they loved me, none of them ever gave their hearts and souls to me like my dogs did. That is my basis for stating dogs have a natural capacity for bonding.
I believe real bonding occurs when a human demonstrates a desire to have more than the Master-Pet relationship. I never considered any of my pets ‘just a dog’ or ‘just a cat.’ Their presence always was and still is an integral part of my daily life. I went four years without a dog after losing Sasha. I told myself it would be impossible to replace her and that the void she left in my life was just too great to fill. When I decided to write a memoir about Sasha I made a promise to myself that I would open my heart to another dachshund when the book published. Dirty Harry, a 2-1/2 year old male dachshund we purchased from Dachshund Idaho Rescue, now enriches my days.
I have failed at bonding with several dogs, which is why I feel choosing the right pet is vital to forming a reciprocal bond – similar to choosing your life’s human companion. The timing is important – what stage in life are you at and what stage in life is the prospective pet at? These parameters change constantly and recognizing that is an important factor in real bonding with an animal. Understanding where you are in life’s stages and where your pet is at in its life cycle is paramount to a successful bond. All relationships are dynamic and influenced by the parties involved. Maybe you are not equipped to handle a puppy in your current stage and recognizing that a mature dog would be mutually beneficial will help you to develop a true bond.
You have to WANT a pet in your everyday life because having an animal requires a 24/7/365 commitment. Like all other relationships, the good and bad are give and take. I knew that as a child and even though I loved all the affection and devotion from my pets I always felt like I (the human) gave more to them than they (the canine) were capable of giving to me. That was, until Sasha demonstrated canine compassion on a level I had not experienced or, to be honest, ever expect to experience again.
Several friends and book reviewers have stated that I was the extraordinary one in my memoir, Sasha, Extraordinary Dachshund. Even though I don’t believe them, enough people have said it so I have to give credence to their opinions. Personally, I believe Sasha and I were just right for each other at the right time in our lives.
I don’t believe the following advice is extraordinary. It is just what I have done and am doing right now, very successfully.
How best can the bond with your animal companion be formed?
1. Love your pet as unconditionally as they love you.
2. Love them on THEIR terms – not yours – if you want a life-long fulfilling relationship.
3. Give them a respectable status in your life – like you would any other friend or companion.
4. Willingly attend to their basic needs – food, shelter, warmth and comfort in all elements.
5. Devote time to developing that relationship – setting boundaries and living up to your end of the bargain.
6. Understand having a pet is a financial commitment – food, medical/dental, licenses, vaccinations, toenails, grooming and toys.
7. Maintain their health – they cannot set their own vet appointments. Just as your health affects every ounce of who & what you are at any given moment that is also true for your pet.
8. Recognize and accept you may not be the right human for that specific pet – then do everything possible to find the right one for them.
Respectfully,
CJ Adams
You may now purchase Sasha, Extraordinary Dachshund directly from CJ by ordering a printed copy from www.dachsielove.com. and she will gladly autograph them. Printed copies are also available at Amazon.com.
You may purchase electronic versions of Sasha, Extraordinary Dachshund at: Amazon.com, BarnesAndNoble.com, Google eBooks and iBooks.
About CJ Adams
CJ Adams wrote this memoir to let all animal guardians know there are many healing options available for their treasured pets. During her research she began the process of healing from the loss of Sasha and now begins a search for her next little friend. CJ is honored by those that honor Sasha’s memory by reading their story. CJ is happily married to Mel, and lives in Boise, Idaho.
About the Book
CJ Adams pens a warm and entertaining tale of life with an exceptional dachshund. A friendship that endured paralysis and a cure through acupuncture and holistic medicine. You will enjoy every page of this heartwarming journey through the lives of the very precocious Sasha; the devoted, but not too smart Miniature Pinscher/Chihuahua mix, Squirt; the enduring pack-leader and CJ’s husband, Mel; and CJ, the woman who loves them all with every fiber of her being. All animal lovers understand that each pet that comes into our lives is special but that sometimes you are blessed with an extraordinary animal. For CJ that was Sasha. This memoir is about a cycle of life involving family, friends, paralysis, other pets, aging and loss. When faced with the possibility of euthanizing a 4-year-old Sasha, a desperate CJ turns to holistic veterinary medicine and acupuncture to save her Extraordinary Dachshund and learns how to use this “alternative medicine” to complement traditional veterinary medicine. Be prepared to laugh out loud, wonder and learn something new.
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I have had many “pets” over the years, but until I adopted my first mini dachshund “Sophie” I never knew what true bonding with an animal was. Don’t get me wrong, I loved and cared for my other pets but as you say, it’s where you are in life.. My Sophie and Lucy are a huge part of our family and they are loved, cared for, spoiled, and loved some more.. thank you for such a great article on bonding…